Different Just Means Different

by Debbie Brosius, Argentina

All I said was, “In the States, some doctors have separate waiting rooms for sick kids and healthy kids.” To that point, I had been having a very ordinary conversation with one of my Argentine friends. She had complained that a child could go into a doctor’s office in Argentina with one sickness and come out with two! My comment seemed like a very innocent and natural response to her statement, until I heard her terse reply. “When are you going to realize that you are not in the States anymore?” Her words struck straight to my heart! I sensed that I had committed an innocent but serious cultural mistake.

I had fallen into an all too common trap for foreigners (especially Americans) who move to a new country. I had compared my native home to hers in a way that she interpreted as condescending. That certainly was not my intention. In fact, I had been trying so hard not to compare, not to complain, and to love all things Argentine! I knew that we should resist the urge to inform them of “how things are done in the USA.” Even when they inquire about our customs, we must be careful. After all, criticizing one’s country seldom builds good bridges for the gospel.

“…you are not in the States anymore! ” Her words revealed an attitude that further complicates the situation. There is a subtle anti–American sentiment that already exists in many parts of the world. (In some places it’s not so subtle.) They already have preconceived ideas about Americans that are not always accurate…or even fair. Even though we also arrive with our own predetermined opinions, the playing field is not always even. However, as the “foreigners”, the burden lies upon us to minimize the offenses and maximize the good will.

To that end, I’m trying to see things in Argentina as just different. I confess that there are a myriad of things here that still catch my attention. Why must I hand deliver a utility payment instead of dropping a check in the mail? Why can’t I just pick up the phone to arrange for new electrical service instead of going to the office in person? Now I try to remind myself that they are simply different—and it’s okay to be different!

If we want to reach Argentine souls, we cannot build red, white and blue walls. When Jesus sat down at the well beside the Samaritan woman, he did not start by telling her what a nice, modern place Jerusalem was with its lovely temple and walls. He spoke to her about what she understood: water, husbands, and sin. I cried the day I left my wonderful America–and in many ways I still struggle to leave her behind. But at the urging of my Argentine friend, I’m striving to leave my American ways in America, and simply see things here as different. That’s a small price to pay for the sake of the gospel, and the soul of a friend.